Blessings and new fights

Things are still going smoothly for me. Physical therapy/electrotherapy is going well. The only concern I have is the shape my cheek makes when I smile...it's hard to explain but it doesn't curve like the other side does (don't know why I expected it to) so I'm going to ask if there is anything we can do to shape it, and possibly an injectible or something for the top lip because it flattens out almost completely...but we'll get to that.

As my long battle is now at a still I can look around and count my many blessings. My health, my family, my friends...the generosity of spirit and prayer that have helped me through this whole experience.

I am proud but sad to have to pass on this generosity to a friend who is now beginning a fight of her own. If any and all of you could send up some prayers for Anne. She is proof that no one is too young, too healthy, or just too darn GOOD to be battling the Big C. I ask all that positive energy that I received please pass her way as we all pray and love her through this.

A little Zoe funny today

After my PT appointment today (will post a video later), I took Zoe to the park and then to Chick Fil A because she wanted chicken for lunch....and with this kid I do not fight it when she wants to eat something of substance! So we go in and she goes NUTS because they are all decorated for Christmas "Mommy, look! Cows and Christmas!" and she's bopping along singing to herself. This is how she earned the nickname "Zoe the Musical" of course. We return from washing our hands and she's still bopping along, singing. Then, out of nowhere she leans, quick like a fox, into a booth and shouts "I LOOOOOOOOOOVE CHRISTMAS!!" at this family. The man looked like he had the stuffing scared right out of him and I couldn't stop laughing. This kid is a dream come true most days, I wonder if I'll ever be able to fully express to her how much fun she is as a child.

So very very thankful

3rd post surgical visit

Today was the 3rd post surgical checkup with my doctor. We are doing VERY well! I have a turned up smile on one side (not very big, think Mona Lisa). But considering that at my last checkup, we were both bummed to have no movement showing at all. And now, just a bit over a month later we have definite success.

It should only get better from here. He said with this muscle graft, sometimes it can work a little too well and the smile can be too big...but I'm not going to worry about that. He said it can be up to 2 years before you stop seeing progression...so while this came on pretty fast, it's important to remember that the rest of it may take awhile. I can be a little patient, now that I know it's working.

I can still go in later and change the electrical/nerve feed for the muscle. That would require another graft, another hospital stay (only 2 days though) and more therapy. At this point, since the "hard part" is over, I'm not ruling it out like I once was. But I'm not actively planning or pursuing it. I can't think of a reason that I would even consider it for the next couple of years. Especially since my doctor is retiring within a year...that makes me so sad. He is AMAZING.

So you may wonder if I think it was all "worth it". The answer is, I don't know yet. I ask myself if this was all I was going to get, would I think it was worthwhile. I need some more time before I know the answer...because each day we've gotten a little more benefit. I'm not ready to say it was worth EVERYTHING...but I am not sorry I took this path. If nothing else, it brought me a little peace. I tried something. I did what was available for me to take action and what little bit of control I could in the situation. THAT was totally worth it...yes even worth that God awful liquid diet!

So I'm good, and hoping to be better at the next installment!

Love, Jen

Older video

This is one of my therapy sessions from about 2 months and 2 weeks post surgery. We are using direct current electrotherapy to stimulate and innervate the muscle and get it moving. It doesn't hurt, just in case it looks to you like it does. The ground pad (on my arm, don't know if you can see that) actually is the only part that ever hurts and that just depends on how high we have the intensity. Even in the 2 weeks since this video was taken, we have gotten much more movement. The second one, if I was able to load it, was just a smile check I did in the car.

Videos

This video is from today. We are now 3 months and 2 days away from surgery. The further I get, the more I really really wish we could do something about my eye. Sorry about the lighting coming from one side...I needed to back up to a mirror so I knew my face was in the camera range.

Halloween

Spooktacular Halloween! My little candy corn witch was adorable as always. She decided our costumes in September. When she chose to be a witch she informed me I would be her cat. Um, ok. Because there are SO many modest, appropriate cat costumes for adult women! Anyway. I was pretty proud of those tights! Made from white tights and then fabric tape with the arm warmers~